You know you’ve lived in the UAE too long when…

Three hairstylists working on my hair....can you blame me?
Three hairstylists working on my hair….can you blame me?

Living in the UAE for two-and-a-half years, I’ve changed.

I’m the first to admit it.

I’ve developed a princess concept – and if you’ve lived here for longer than six months, chances are you have developed some of these too.

Carrying anything

I used to pride myself on carrying heavy bags.

Now, service staff won’t hear of it…and frankly, neither will I.

kimkanyebirkThere’s always a helpful man nearby to carry our bags, whether it’s a tiny overnight bag, a few groceries or a baby or small child.

The UAE has a huge amount of people happy to help serve you, pack your grocery bags, escort you to the car with them.

Parking your car

No. Just no.

With valets at every hotel, shopping centre, hospital and even restaurants, we shudder at the thought of having to navigate through a car park.

We’d rather wait at the hotel lobby thank you very much.

Valet-in-LA-originalparking.com_ Getting EVERYTHING delivered 

No I won’t go and get my own water, thank you very much. I’ll have it delivered, to my door.

While you’re at it…bring me some bananas and milk too… oh and maybe I’ll get my dinner, laundry and some cupcakes delivered too.

Having full table-service, even in coffee shops, at bars, clubs, anywhere really

We’ll be having none of this ‘order and pay at the counter’ nonsense, thank you very much. We’d rather wait 15 minutes for the waiter to come and take my order, while We’re sitting comfortably because hey, we can.

Going home causes stress and confusion – having to walk up to a counter to order things, and serve my own water…sorry what!?

It's free...and while you're at it, sprinkle some 24K gold on that shit
It’s free…and while you’re at it, sprinkle some 24K gold on that shit

Ladies Nights

Free drinks for ladies, all night.

There’s no catch most of the time.

Visitors often are shocked; ‘so we get free drinks…just for being girls?’ which causes pain when us UAE girlies actually have to go out and (lord forbid) PAY for drinks.

Swanning about in five-star hotels

How you do opulence: Ritz Carlton Abu Dhabi
How you do opulence: Ritz Carlton Abu Dhabi

Rarely, if ever, would I set foot in a five-star hotel in my home country – the pubs are dingy little corner houses and the nightclubs are in industrial fit outs back in our native lands, whereas here, all the nightclubs are nestled in the back of grand hotels.

We spend our beach days at beach clubs, our lunches in hotels, and our Fridays at brunch in posh outlets.

What have we become?

What do you think? How have you changed since living here?

Check @DubaiWanker on Twitter for more on UAE Diva Antics.

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